Staying indoors for good reason

Two co-workers had a mild disagreement at a previous job.  Upon finding out they were on a different sides of an issue, they had this exchange:

Co-worker 1 (jokingly:) Let's take it outside!
Co-worker 2: But it's cold out there!
Co-worker 1: Well...Then, next Spring, let's take it outside!
Co-worker 2: We sure sound tough, don't we?

It's encouraging that even when people disagree, they can still be flexible enough to postpone their bloodletting.

Watchcat protocol CCCLVII

It's important that watchcats listen carefully to any security-related intelligence their proxy watchcats gather:

2017: Watchcat Sylvia processes the details of Proxy Sylvia's security report.

Watchcat protocol CCCLVI

Sometimes, it's advisable for a watchcat to assume the pose of a statue.  That way, an intruder won't know (s)he's being watched:

August 2019: Watchcat Lily blends into the background unobtrusively.

A linguistic irritant XCI

I have never referred to a cup of coffee as a cup of joe.  There's a perfectly good word for coffee already.

It's coffee!

Glad that's settled...

Watchcat protocol CCCLV

Watchcats are entitled to take meal breaks, just as people are.  When a watchcat takes such a break, however, it's important to have other animals on hand to guard the assigned sector.  Hence, the watchmice:

September 2019: Watchcat Lily looks up from her food bowl while watchmice stay nearby, ready to stand guard when she resumes eating.

Watchcat protocol CCCLIV

Sometimes, it's necessary for a human being to transport a watchcat from one guard post to another.  It helps if the watchcat is at ease with this:

September 2019: Watchcat Lily allows herself to be carried to her assigned guard post.

A linguistic irritant XC

Although I appreciate the politeness of the phrase, "at your earliest convenience," I've often felt tempted to test its limits.  (i.e. "No, I didn't pay that bill, fill out that survey, or return your call yet.  I thought I needed eight full hours of sleep first.  You want me to be well-rested, don't you?  Also, although it's only September, I want to shop for Christmas gifts while I'm inspired.  Obviously, that should take precedence over the task you want me to complete.  Also, my cat wants a drink of water from the kitchen sink.  'At my earliest convenience?'  You'd better bring a chair.")

Watchcat protocol CCCLIII

Know that if you assign watchcats to shoe guard duty, they might feel free to try on the shoes.  It's just something they do:

July 2006: Watchcat Rosie guards and attempts to wear a pair of shoes.

Watchcat protocol CCCLII

It's important for a watchcat to be assertive, put his or her paw down, and show intruders who's in charge.  Watchcat Nemo exemplified this in July 2011:

Watchcat protocol CCCLI

It's permissible to pet a watchcat, provided Watchcat Headquarters has vetted you properly:

October 2010: Watchcat Headquarters determined that the person petting Watchcat Nemo posed no security threat.

Watchcat protocol CCCL

Being a watchcat means having to stop one task and attend to another one sometimes.  While guarding shoes, you might hear a suspicious sound, for instance:

May 2007: Watchcat Sammy looks up after hearing an odd sound.  He investigated the source of the sound while Watchcat Rosie took over watching the shoes.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLIX

It's always a good strategy for a watchcat to stay wide-eyed and alert.  Watchcat Lily has demonstrated that this year:

A linguistic irritant LXXXIX

It's mildly irksome to me whenever anyone says, "It's not within my power to..."  Just say you don't have the authority or access to do something.  Saying, "It's not within my power...," makes you sound like a slightly imperfect deity.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLVIII

You know a watchcat is taking his job seriously when he shows respect for the items he's guarding:

November 2005: Watchcat Sammy shows his respect for the shoes he's watching.

No one's at fault, but...

One recent day, the streets felt more like an obstacle course to me than usual.  I had to navigate around construction work, a detour, and pedestrians wandering into the street while staring at their phones.  No one was committing any grave offense, so I couldn't really be all that angry.  I realized this when I started to complain, "Ah, damned...um, rest of humanity?"

I can't help feeling like I've made a similar complaint before.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLVII

It's advisable for another watchcat to be nearby while a watchcat is getting used to a new guard post:

October 2003: Watchcat Sammy tests out his new guard post in a paper bag while Watchcat Rosie looks on.

Just another text about existential despair

To test my cell phone's messaging capability, I wrote, "We are specks of dust in an indifferent universe," and texted it to my email address.  The first auto reply suggested was, "I know."

Serves me right, I guess, for texting myself such a pedestrian sentiment...

Watchcat protocol CCCXLVI

When a watchcat maintains this expression at her guard post, you know she's taking the job seriously:

August 2007: Watchcat Rosie is on the job--and won't tolerate any nonsense.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLV

When you hire a watchcat, you're trusting that watchcat's judgment about what constitutes security.  Thus, you can expect well-considered, decisive action, as Watchcat Sammy exhibited in October 2016:

Drawing the line

I have excerpts of one-year-later radio segment looks back from 2002 of the horrific events of September 11, 2001.  I probably won't listen to them this year, however.  I've read numerous articles online today, looking back at that awful-beyond-belief day.  Hearing the voices of innocent people who are no longer here because of hateful people's contempt for them, however, puts me on edge.  One of these years, I will listen to those programs again.  Not today, however.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLIV

Watchcat Headquarters likes it when watchcats respect the tools of their trade:

August 2011: Watchcat Sammy shows respect for the stick of dynamite but would have used it on an intruder if the situation called for it.

Watchcat protocol CCCXLIII

Need to check a shipping container to make sure it's safe and sturdy enough to send?  A watchcat can check that for you, as Watchcat Sammy did in 2005:

Watchcat protocol CCCXLII

An outdoor watchcat has the added burden of contending with the elements.  In Spring 2004, Stray Cat managed to stay on guard, despite being in the heat:

"Elaborate, please."

I remember watching a local show for kids decades ago that taught kids about letters and numbers.  The host said to the assembled panel, "I think we can all agree that D is a good letter."

As I recall, no one responded.  After all, how do you defend or refute that premise?

Watchcat protocol CCCXLI

Watchcats Sammy and Rosie lobbied for separate comfy guard posts in October 2010.  They didn't take their jobs any less seriously, however:

Watchcat protocol CCCXL

A museum watchcat needs confidence--confidence that shows she's in charge of all she surveys.  Watchcat Rosie exhibited this self-assurance in Summer 2003:

A linguistic irritant LXXXVIII

It amuses me when people say they need to redouble their efforts.  Isn't it sufficient to say they need to strengthen or increase them?  Also, why would you say redouble instead of double if you're going to specify a measurement?

Watchcat protocol CCCXXXIX

Want to make sure a pair of shoes is safe to wear?  Let a watchcat inspect them.  For good measure, let two watchcats inspect them:

July 2009: Watchcats Sammy and Rosie give a pair of shoes clearance.

A linguistic irritant LXXXVII

Something you learn early in your school days: When a teacher or administrator says, "You might want to...," it means, "Do this."

Watchcat protocol CCCXXXVIII

When the backup watchcats are napping, it's important for the primary watchcat to stay alert:

December 2014: Watchcat Nemo picks up the slack while Blue Cat and Proxy Nemo slumber.